Masters Age Player Has Now Officially Heard It All
Rebecca Polski, 41, today announced that there were officially no more Frisbee stories that hadn’t been done by somebody else when she was at uni. This comes after a rookie on her team, Jemima Cartwright, 19, told her a story about a debaucherous night at University Nationals.
“I mean this story was really crazy,” says Polski. “It involved 11 beers, some zip ties, and a very confused pigeon. But really, it pales in the face of our antics in the 90's.”
Polski is now confident to say that every potential unbelievable event at a Frisbee tournament, especially those that involve someone who “was totally wasted”, has already happened and that there are no more original pranks, challenges, situations, hook-ups, embarrassing moments, or sideline shenanigans left in the known universe.
“I mean, the only difference between now and when I was at Uni is that everything is on Snapchat. But seriously, if you're trying to convince that is the first time a thing has happened at a Frisbee party, Matt Dowle probably did it in the 90s.”
Cartwright was initially skeptical, but soon realised that Polski had indeed shared a lot of her experiences.
“She literally started finishing my sentences,” Polski said. “When I started telling her about the guy who vomited at the Nationals party, she had already guessed the location, the exact reason he vomited, and who he hooked up with directly after. It was like playing spew-based Cluedo.”
“Haha, Spewdo,” she chuckled to herself.
For her part, Polski hopes that Cartwright and the new generation of rookies can prove her wrong. But she’s not holding out hope.
“Honestly, most of the kids these days are so tame. They just have a beer or two, huff a few nangs, and go to bed early.”
“Not in my day,” she implied, without actually saying it.